War Of Time
by Seravia
Summary: A new time, a new war. But this war can't be fought with blades. Tribute to May 14th.


War Of Time By: RedHairRurouniFan 

**Author's Notes:** This is a standard diary one-shot in honor of May 14, 2007. Which, as we all know, May 14th is the day Kenshin left Kaoru for Kyoto. This is a diary in Kenshin's thoughts the entire week that led up to May 14th. This is how I think his decision came to be. I will skip a couple of days, because if I don't then the fic will be too repetitive. Hope it isn't too bad; it was a little last minute.

_Meiji 11__th__, May 6__th_

I've been having strange dreams lately. Recently, I've had, well, more like nightmares, of the times during the Bakumatsu. The most prominent one was, the time I fought Saitou. I dreamt every detail. It was as if I were there at that moment in time when I was sleeping. Okita and I were about to fight, but Saitou stepped in. He said that he would be the one to kill the legendary Battousai. I gave him my angry, yet cold and emotionless glare, and readied my sword. He switched his sword to his left hand and drew back his arm with practiced ease. Then, he leapt into action, springing forward and thrusting his katana toward my chest with expert speed. I countered, sprinting forward as well, and thrusting out my own blade in efforts of using the weapon break. Then, when such a monstrous force followed, I realized, instantaneously, this was the gatotsu. I was woken up by Kaoru and Yahiko, but I couldn't shake my unease. When we got home, we found Sano lying on the dojo floor unconscious, with blood pooling slowly beneath him. Megumi-dono treated him and I stayed to investigate. Saitou left clues. He left the medicine box, which was the Shinsengumi's disguise, the gaping hole in the wall signifying his destructive power, and the blade left in the wound parallel to the ground, sure to be the gatotsu. I sat in silence scowling into the dark that night.

_Meiji 11__th__, May 7__th_

Today, I received a letter from Saitou. He asked me to meet him, but I found Akamatsu Arundo there to fight me. When he was defeated, I returned home. When I got to the gate, I found Kaoru waiting for me. She told me someone was after my life. I was alarmed that she should know. She then explained that a police officer called Fujita Goro told her. She also said that he was waiting to speak with me. I was relieved upon hearing that, but was still on guard. I found it odd that the police should know about Saitou. When I stepped into the dojo, I immediately realized that the police officer was none other than Saitou Hajime, leader of the 3rd squad of the Shinsengumi. I said so, and he challenged me to a duel. Kaoru tried to stop me but I knew that this was a battle I would not be able to avoid. He came at me, and I tried to avoid it, but the sword came through my chest. Thankfully, it was the side of my chest, so I was not injured too badly. However, a bit later, I changed into Battousai, then, I was ready to kill Saitou. We both would have died too, if Kawaji-dono had not stopped us. I punched myself in the face, changing back from Battousai, but I learned that Shishio was back. I didn't know what to do when Okubo-san asked for my assistance. I felt surprised when my friends all defended me, saying that they would not allow me to go to a death match. Then, I realized that I couldn't get them all involved.

_Meiji 11__th__, May 8__th_

It was just a normal day today, but I saw the glance Kaoru gave me. She seemed uneasy. I couldn't find the normal confidence in her eyes. She seemed truly afraid I would leave. That just made it 10 times harder for me to decide to leave. I seemed to have fooled everyone else with my façade of seeming unfazed. I didn't let anyone see that I felt I should go to Kyoto. My heart told me to stay, but if I listened to my heart, all of Japan would fall to Shishio. He would make everyone's lives complete chaos. Now more than ever, my heart has been swaying between the Hitokiri and Rurouni. Each battle I've fought since staying here has brought me closer to my Hitokiri self each time. I could see that that was what Saitou was thinking. I know it myself without being told. That is why I cannot stay. If I transform into hitokiri again, I fear that I will hurt them. They are all much too important to me. Especially Kaoru. I f I let **her** get hurt, I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I don't know what to do. I know what my heart is telling me, and I know what my conscience is telling me. I know that my heart will never win. I've never followed my heart, except when I chose to stay with Kaoru. I don't why, but it happened. My heart told me and I complied. I think I have reached a decision.

_Meiji 11__th__, May 9__th_

Another normal day. Kaoru knows something has changed in me. I think she might have an idea of what I will end up doing. I know it will break her heart, but… I think I have to. I think going to Kyoto is the right thing to do.

_Meiji 11__th__, May 11__th_

More time has passed, and I think I understand that this is something I must do. I don't want to go, but… what can I do when the country needs me? Okubo-san came to me himself to ask for my assistance. I know this is beyond serious. My decision is beginning to take shape, and take root in my heart. My heart is fighting a losing battle. Once again, my actions will be based on what needs to be done rather than what I want to do. I need to learn the final secret of Hiten Misurugi Ryuu. I feel that is the key to defeating Shishio and the hitokiri within myself. I can't believe what I am about to do.

_Meiji 11__th__, May 13__th_

My deadline is approaching swiftly. Precious time with my friends and Kaoru are slipping away. I want it to stay. I can't bear to leave then all. Yet I am. They all mean far too much to me. Why must there be so little time? I can see that Kaoru is getting more and more restless. I want to reassure her, but… I can't. If I did, my words would be lies. I can't stand seeing her this way, but… I cannot do anything either. My decision is final. I am going to Kyoto. I will tell Okubo-san tomorrow.

_Meiji 11th, May 14__th_

It's today. May 14th is here. My time with Kaoru is up. Today is my deadline. I have made my decision. I'm going to Kyoto. I went to see Okubo-san, but he was assassinated. That is the last straw. If this is the type of country Shishio will run, then… I must defeat him. So, I made my decision and went back to the dojo to tell Kaoru goodbye. I hid in the shadows until she was alone. I told her that I would wander, that I was going to Kyoto. But… why was it that my words felt so empty? Why did it feel like I wasn't speaking them? They fell out of my mouth as if I had rehearsed them. I guess I thought of what to do when this moment came one too many times. I watched as Kaoru's eyes filled with fear, and I wanted to turn away. I hugged her and told her Sayonara. I did not think I would ever see her again. I turned and left her, my heart in turmoil. A tear fell from my eye as I walked away, but I could not turn back. I disappeared form their lives. Kaoru fell to her knees behind me and I heard her call out for me and burst into tears. But… my decision was final. I left for Kyoto. I was finally able to admit that I loved Kaoru. We were all fighting a war this past week. A War Of Time.

**End Notes:** So? What do you all think? It is a fic in memory of May 14th, the most important date in the entire Ruroken storyline. Well, actually, basically the only date given to us, but still. Is the fic good? Please review! I'd love to hear your thoughts on it! I hope you didn't hate it! Thanks for reading!


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